I think we all love taking the time out to sit in the sun. It re-energises us and can help soothe our souls, don’t you think? 

Whilst writing this very article I have been taking in the sun, letting in recharge me. There is something about it that I find so energising. The sun hasn’t been around these parts that much of late, actually it has been downright chilly for the most part. Every so often though you will see the sun. it will be peeking out from behind the clouds for moments, before disappearing again and you just have to take what you can get of course.

We have also hit that time of the year where it gets really cold just as the sun is going down. I mean chill you to the bone kind of cold. That cold that takes you a while in front of a nice heater to shake off.

I guess you get used to it, but at the moment, with the medication, I’m on for my heart and the after effects of the heart attack that I suffered in December 2017, I just seem to feel the cold more these days. For that matter, I think I feel any change in temperature more these days, I think it just takes the wind straight out of my sails.

Hopefully this new found sensitivity to the changes in the weather won’t last as I’m thinking that might put a dampener on any future holiday plans that I might make to anywhere too hot or anywhere too cold.

I’ve been feeling kind of all over the place of late, and there isn’t a hell of a lot that I can do about my circumstances at the moment. Mostly I have just been trying to hold onto my sanity as best I can.
It is kind of sad though because when I am around people I just want to be alone and then when I am alone I feel anxious and start to catastrophise.

Last night I was home alone and settled in for a quiet night of Netflix, well that was all well and good till I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick, probably due to my meds, that was where I freaked because I had to deal with it all by myself without access to anyone to help. I felt so alone and when I was able to settle a little all I could think of was how exposed I was if something happened to me, how alone I really was, I’d have had no hope of getting help had it been a major event and not just a case of me feeling a bit unwell. It freaked me out is all. I did manage to fall back asleep finally, but then the day after just felt like a wasted day because I was so wigged out and stressed from the event.

So here it is, me starting to write from my heart and let it out so that I can recharge and let my life back in to fill the gaps that my health scare created. 

What does everyone else do when they need to try and find themselves?

 what do you do when you need to find that confidence to keep on going on with your day?

I guess I will just have to soak up the sun for a little while longer and then hopefully just start putting one foot in front of the other.